Just read this beautiful article on caesarean births., and wanted to share my own story.
It was 10 weeks before my due date when my waters broke, at first they weren’t planning on inducing, but my daughter’s heart rate kept dropping. Eventually they decided they couldn’t risk waiting for labour to start naturally, neither did they think inducing me would be safe for her, so they ordered an emergency c-section.
The c-section was far from straight forward from my point of view, the spinal didn’t work. One leg went numb and nothing else, but the anaesthetist didn’t believe me so they started to cut. Of course I felt it. Eventually they put me under a general, rushed my husband away, and everything went black. My last thoughts were, “what if I can still feel this”.
When I woke my daughter was already in SCBU, no newborn cuddles for me. And I just kept asking for more and more morphine because the pain was horrendous. At least giving birth vaginally the pain ended when the birth did, with the c-section I spent a while drifting in and out, waking to severe pain like I’d never known before.
Eventually I’m awake enough to move to the ward, I was lucky in that all the other women in my room had prem babies, but we could all hear the cries of the other babies down the hall. Knowing ours were on a different floor entirely.
Eventually I got to go meet my daughter, but the pain and morphine meant just standing by her incubator made me dizzy and sick. I lasted less than 5 minutes before having to retreat back to my own bed.
From that point I had to push through the pain to go see her, with daily visits to the hospital for 6 weeks. The walk from car park to SCBU was agony, just getting in and out of the car required monumental effort. It’d never occurred to me how agonising it could be, even turning over in bed was apt to have me writhing in pain. Breastfeeding and expressing milk sent awful cramps through my already very tender flesh. Every cough and sneeze was terrifying.
I hate this stupid idea that c-sections are the lazy option. I worked far harder for far longer with the c-section than I did with the vaginal birth.